Why was I brought to this world? Who were my parents? I didn’t dare breathe. The air smelled of fish—dirty, rotten fish, and the slightest of sea salt. In the distance I saw a long boardwalk out to sea. Dark, musty, wooden, it gave off the air of failure. I shivered, but not with cold. In front of me was the village I was born in. A poor fishing village hidden in South Korea. I looked back. My family stood behind me. My sister looked nervously at me. My “family.” My “sister.” They didn’t look like me. The blood that ran through their veins wasn’t anything like mine. I took a step on the gritty road, gazing at the old, decaying houses. They stood desolately by the ocean. It was Easter, so the town was abandoned. I guess no one wanted to spend their Easter here, in this sad old village. But here I stood. Clouds covered the blue sky, the sun refusing to shine. I looked back and saw my family cautiously walking forward. But they weren’t my family. This was where my real parents would have lived. My father would have been a fisherman, out to sea for such long periods of time that my mother and I would probably worry. My mother would stay at home, cook, wash, and do other housecleaning duties. I, her daughter, wouldn’t go to school, wouldn’t go out into the world. Instead I would be at home, repeating my mother’s life and her mother’s life. But here I stood. My real parents were either dead or they abandoned me. Who knew why or how. This old village, full of people I would have known, was poor. Who knew if I would have ever had enough to eat. Why was I brought to this world? Who were my parents? Burning questions that would never die out. Their flames will sting me forever. I felt strangely distant from the woman, man, and their daughter behind me. I had been counted as a family member for so long, but somehow here, now, made me feel separated from them. They gave me food, clothes, and shelter. They took me with them on their travels around the world. Their daughter spent countless hours giggling with me, carefree. The man teased, joked, warned me to stay away from boys. He helped to get my homework done. He embarrassed me in front of my friends, and then we laughed about it later. The woman stayed home with me when I was sick. Wrapped her arms and warm blankets around me. She gave me advice and gave me sympathy. Gave me love. If I lived here, I would never have met them. I wouldn’t know who they are. Everyone back home, all my friends, teachers, mentors, coaches… Everything I knew, everyone I know, everywhere I’ve been… All I believe in… Nonexistent. Suddenly dizziness swept over me. My knees buckled. My hand grabbed for a railing, a pole, something to give me support, to help me stand. Tears rushed to my eyes. I didn’t dare look behind me. Then I felt warm, sturdy hands help me up. I found myself looking into the eyes of my mother. My adoptive mother. But it didn’t matter. She had been everything a mother should be. She whispered my Korean name in my ear. Jin Ae. Its meaning: truth. I stood up. I grabbed my mother’s hand. We walked back to my family, turning away from the life I would have had. Ellie Woody, 13Lincoln, Nebraska Sanobar Shariff, 13TamilNadu, India
November/December 2014
Reflection
I spread my sides, flattening like Play-Doh, And close my eyes as light spreads its fingers over my back. My blood heats and spills warmth into my tail and toes. Hidden prey sings the song of my recognition and their mating. I open my eyes to see a lizard. He lies on his tri-colored boulder like a scaly draping. He looks dull against his darkened, nonsensical, almost see-through background. Another sun rests above his head. How nice it must be to have the sun follow you around. He cocks his head as I do the same, He often comes when the crickets sing and often sits on his red rock. Tonight he is a wet bearded dragon, like he was in the rain. As I have been, Warm water poured down my head as I stood, Up to my sides, in water before I went to my den. Prey sits in front of him as a chirp sounds in my ear. I admire the diamonds on his back, so like my own, And the red and white around his ears I also thought were mine alone. Our close resemblance is queer. His tail is gray but red striped and tame. And his head is the work of a perfectionist artist In its perfect symmetrical design only nature can claim. I clamber off my red basking rock and so does he. This night he moves with me, mirroring my every move. He looks so close he could be me. Then click… the sun is dark. My eyes see in the new land instantly, But the lizard in gone, where does he lurk? I pull my dragon body over my hill into my cave, And wonder if he will come on the dawn of tomorrow Genevieve Jacobs, 12Tallahassee, Florida
The Interference
Timing is a funny thing. Some religious figures see it as fate, when in reality, it’s chance. The world doesn’t care about any one person enough to stop its continuously moving clock and allow what some people see as “fate” to occur. The world is morphing and changing all around us, and having bad timing can alter what could have been to what actually is. And that is exactly what happened to Helen and Rose, or what might have happened. I suppose I’ll just start at the end, since I have already spoiled it for you. If, say, this story were to be written in any sort of organized manner, the last few words would say, “Helen and Rose never officially met, and therefore, the course of history wasn’t altered even the tiniest bit. The world kept spinning, the sun kept shining, and the birds kept singing as usual.” Oh, but that’s no fun, is it? What would you learn from that story? That timing is awful, and constantly doing us wrong? I’ll continue my story, starting from the end of it all, and hopefully give you a little something more to think about. Destiny was trying to make its way into the world again Now, I have already told you that the girls never met, but what if I told you that they almost did? Oh, they were so close! One of the opportunities, the last, to be precise, was a sweltering hot July afternoon, yet Helen was cool as a cucumber, and pale as one, too, in her study. Meanwhile, Rose was attending yet another appointment with the swimming pool and was as crispy as a potato chip. A few hours later, Helen hopped in her car, for no apparent reason but to drive, and Rose mounted her motorcycle (for no apparent reason but to leave). And for a second, as they passed each other on the road, they made unmistakable eye contact. Silly, worthless eye contact, really. The kind where each person thinks, “I am so much better than her,” because, in fact, that eye contact was the only factor holding their destined meeting back. If they hadn’t seen each other at that pitiful time, a little later down the road, Helen would have noticed the poor, shivering girl in her swimsuit, offered to give her a ride, and, well, you know what would have happened. But that wasn’t the case, so each girl’s world remained unaltered, again. Now, let’s rewind to a few years earlier, at Rose’s sweet-sixteen party, aka the party, at Bowl on a Penny, “the cheapest bowling in America!” which just so happened to be Helen’s place of employment at the time. As they bowled, Rose, a clearly inexperienced bowler, rolled a bowling ball so softly that it came to a halt only a few feet away from where she had dropped it. Laughing as if her daughter had just told the funniest joke in the world, Rose’s mom walked over to a lovely young girl at the Snack Shop. That girl turned the task over to (who else, but…) Helen, of course! Destiny was trying to make its way into the world again. Grudgingly, Helen waddled up to the alley, right as Rose’s friends all gathered around her to give her the presents. Helen handed Rose’s mom the bowling ball, with a hinted “you’re welcome,” and returned to the Snack Shop. And that was the end of it, yet another missed opportunity. In fact, they both had a few opportunities to meet each other. Each one they missed left them two steps behind, and yet another opportunity caught them off guard. Their first opportunity was truly a shame. It was the perfect scenario, both girls were in the same store, in the same location, on the same day. The only issue: timing. And though one may groan at the agony of all these missed opportunities, I can sure as anything tell you what would have happened had these scenarios ended in a meeting of the two girls. Yes, it would have been a great friendship at first, filled with many great memories. However, a few years later, Helen would convince Rose to spend less time at the pool. Rose would encourage Helen to give up on her dreams and goals to relax more. Over time, they would gnash away at each person’s individual talents and characteristics and morph into the “normal” person—do nothing great, achieve nothing great, learn nothing great. So be thankful for timing, for the people life lets you meet, and those who life doesn’t. Now that you know what would have happened if fate had won over reality, be mindful that with the people life gives you, you control your destiny with them. And always be thankful for chance, because this world would have lost two individuals, Helen and Rose, without it. Lily Strauss, 12Leawood, Kansas Jia Qi Liu, 13Oakland, California
